Funny

Funny
Funny to me that you’re crying
As I was writing the pages of a summer love
But now that it’s months on
And I’m done
I’m in the wrong

Hmm

Funny
Funny how you could never write your own words
As if you could never feel your own feelings 
Always going back to who hurt you
Who stopped you 
And that was you
Don’t you remember?
Can’t see it for the sun in the sky?
Or is it too clear to realize
Too bright to stare

It’s funny for those of us who don’t care

Funny
Funny that you don’t hold the intelligence
To grow from your experiences
If an archer shot with a poisoned arrow
You would swear that cupid made you fall in love with death
How desperate, how funny

And you’ll never know the half of it

Funny
Funny that you’re too immature to understand the difference
Between a conversation
And a fight
And what would warrant such an escalation

Funny
Funny how you slammed the door 
And held me captive
Pleading
On your goddamned knees
For me not to leave
Not even for one night

Funny
Funny how you locked yourself inside my parents’ downstairs bathroom
You know the one—the one near the kitchen
So every passerby could hear your mutilated tears
As the obvious cry for attention that it was
On the hallowed night that featured my family’s traditions
Only spat disgrace and disgust onto your name
And kept me from my family longer than it should’ve
And for that you should be ashamed

You should’ve taken me for my word when I said
I think we should break up

Funny
How fucking funny it was when you recorded my conversations in private as you were pushing me out of your life
And still had the audacity to say
“They must be cheating”

Ha

Funny
What’s even funnier?
Funny how I worked three jobs six days a week
Had therapy and treatment three days—yes, in the same seven-day week
And I still made time for you
Still made time to take care of what was a home
Still made time to finalize all the plans for an out-of-state move: contacting apartment agencies, submitting applications, completing interviews, paying deposits, and job hunting—not only for myself but, for you too
And in the midst of all this
It’s funny
You were fucking convinced that I was fucking other people
When I finally took the moment to ask
“Are we growing apart?”
And asked for you to provide emotional support

But you couldn’t take that shit on
Much too demanding

Hmm

Funny
Funny how I ran into your best friend at Mickey’s
You know the one
The one you talk so much shit on 
The one you call “so full of herself”
And “more concerned with her music than with her friends”
Too bad she makes decent music at least

Funny how I ran into her and she says you were always looking for an out
You wanted out of this town the moment I met you
Cause you couldn’t do it
You can’t live in a new town
And figure your shit out
Making a living—a living worthwhile
Without the comfort or familiarity
Of that which never changes

Hmm

And funny how when I said I wouldn’t do it anymore
You went right back home
You cried to mommy
Not because you lost me
Or because you’re too delusional to understand what truth tastes like and somebody was finally calling you out on your bullshit and immaturity—calling your bluff, identifying your trauma; suggesting talk therapy might help: “how about you address some of your shit yourself before you project it onto me?” Because you know what? It fucking hurt me and it ruined whatever respect I once had for you and—I’m laughing as I write this: I hope I never see you again

No, you went right back home
Because no one else would give you handouts

Funny
Funny how you said you weren’t nearly as fucked up mentally as my family or friends
You should be ashamed of that too

Funny
So fucking funny to everybody I’ve told
How you said you would only have one therapy session and everything would be fixed
And you know what?
You acted like it did
Only to blow up shit to a higher degree than you had ever before

And I sat there
Silent on the outside
Laughing on the inside

Funny though
Funny how you said the box of condoms didn’t open itself
And how it must’ve been your ‘past trauma’ that opened them
And I agreed
Cause it’s funny to watch a dog chase their tail 

But roots don’t lie
And truths don’t die
You uprooted your life
Thinkin you could grow 

But this whole world’s uninhabitable for you, babe

Or should I say… bro?

You ain’t no beaut
And you ain’t no blessing
You’re nothing but a weed
In need of a whacking
And in your absence, I’ll be laughing

Hm, funny