ix. baby steps, baby!

you have a problem with conflating adoration
thinking that you deserve to be shorthanded love
i have a tendency to deflect my feelings
and take it out on whoever is closest to me
but none of my actions reflect you
you’ve seen some shit but can’t admit it
it’s true

until you walk away with a straight laced smile on your face
you cycle through your day like you’re losing vital opportunities to get louder, get better, get lost
take baby steps, baby
i still obsess over all i’m not and fear the walk down the block
but i feel good, i feel great, i feel wonderful
taking baby steps, baby

what would crawling do?

a lil niche, a lil cringe, maybe too on the nose
lord knows i’ve been a major asshole
with this pen before
as my guardian

and when you’re feeling
the weight of the world on your shoulders
asking if you could come over
tying loose ends with your tight lips so it won’t slip
that you’ve been struggling

what would happen if you slam on the breaks
draw the curtains on the day
and embrace yourself, face yourself

no one else will save you
no one else will want to
no one else could know you like you do

open up the door to
all you want and who you
wish to be walking straight to you
with baby steps, baby